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More Reasons Drinking is Necessary on a First Date

25 Monday Oct 2010

Posted by wendynewell in online dating

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

crazy talk, douchebag, online dating

My date last night was so unbelievably bad I can’t even manage to retell the story again.  I’ve already called and vented to my mom and emailed girlfriends so instead of retyping the entire thing again let’s just relieve last night via the emails I sent to a friend.

To a friend – Sunday, October 24, 2010 8:47 PM
Btw I’m sitting at a bar drinking alone because dog boy isn’t here.  16 min late and counting.  Good thing I have a gin and tonic on front of me.  Yet another reason drinking is necessary on a first date!
To a friend – Sunday, October 24, 2010 8:49 PM
And good thing I downloaded cribbage on my phone!  I love that game.
To my date – Sitting at a bar. Drinking. You aren’t here.

To a friend – Sunday, October 24, 2010 8:57 PM
25 min late.  I sent him an email.  He is, supposedly, a CTO.  Therefore he should have NO PROBLEM getting email in his phone! 

I hate men.  Well not all of them but more than half.

From my “date” – October 24, 2010 9:03:31 PM PDT
I was just there and didn’t see u.. hold on I be there in 8 mins
To a friend while forwarding his email – Sunday, October 24, 2010 9:13 PM (5 more minutes and I would official be at the bar for an hour)
Really.
Based on the few people that are here that isnt possible.
To a friend – Sunday, October 24, 2010 9:31 PM
Omg.  Omg.  Crazy man.
To a friend – Sunday, October 24, 2010 9:34 PM
Seriously.  I need a drink after that “date”.
The date recap to a friend – Monday, October 25, 2010 9:11 AM
OMG.  I can’t even remember all of it.  I wanted to take out my phone and write stuff down so I wouldn’t forget but that seemed rude.  considering how rude he was I should have done it. 

So he finally comes in and finds me.  He demanded he was there for a long time earlier but there is no way.  You know the (edited so you can’t stalk me).  I got there about 10 minutes early.  There was a couple that came in right before me and sat at the end of the bar.  One single guy watching the game from the bar and talking to the bartender.  The doorman was sitting by the fireplace to the right watching the game and I sat by the fireplace to the left.  the game ended maybe 5 minutes after that and the doorman left to do his job so I was THE ONLY ONE SITTING IN THAT SECTION OF THE BAR.  Seriously.  It was like I was diseased.  I was the only blond woman.  The only woman with short hair.  AND THE ONLY PERSON SITTING IN THAT AREA.  It is actually impossible to not see me.

He then demanded that I wasn’t there the entire time and my “clock was wrong.”  BTW nothing he said was in a flirty fun way but a “I’m better than you and so much smarter it’s pathetic” sort of way.  He wasn’t intelligent.  He was actually a bit of a moron and obviously had insecurity issues.

Not attractive.  At all.  BUT we know personality and fun can get you a long way.  Unfortunately he had neither.

Now know at this point I’ve been here 40 minutes and have finished my drink.  He, at no time, made an effort to buy me another one.  A normal person would have apologized and IMMEDIATELY offered to buy me a drink.  This guy did the opposite.  Told me I was wrong about when I got there and didn’t make a move for the bar.

He pushed stools out-of-the-way to sit  RIGHT next to me.  Not across the little bar table to the side like you would expect.  Like we were sitting on the sofa together watching the TV (on mute) above the fireplace.  Then he spent most of the time not looking anywhere near me but at the TV.

The opening:
Wendy – How are the dogs?
Weirdo – People who show up there, you have to wonder if they are doing bad things to the dogs.  At least they aren’t going to die.  Well right away.

UMMMMM ….

Seconds later:
Weirdo – You have a dog?
Wendy – Yes.
Weirdo – Just one? (said as if it was a judgment against me.)
Wendy – Yup.  More than one starts to be a little much for a single lady.
Weirdo – At least you don’t have 3 cats.
Wendy – Nope.  My dog would eat a cat.
Weirdo –  Three dogs are okay but if you have 3 cats you are insane.  (No hesitation.  Stated as a fact.  True, honest, undeniable fact.)
Wend – Or you are a really nice person who likes cats.
Weirdo – No. (Again said with finality.) You are insane.  I know for a fact.

oooookkkkaaay.

Within 5 minutes of sitting down he was insulting my job and my industry.  He now somehow ran the marketing of his company when his profile said he was the CTO.  He then debated me on how ridiculous market research is, knowing it is my job.  His “debating” was more a “you are wrong no matter what you say” type of deal less give and take discussion.

He  pounded the table to help make his point.  Which he did often.  While staring at the TV.

Turns out he works for a company that developed a software that helps families with autistic children be matched with financial and medical help.  Figures.  He would definitely score on the autistic spectrum.  Imagine what it would be like talking to Trump about what he does for a living.  The over inflated ego, no one is as good, I’m the only person in the world who is this important.  It was like that.

In an email he said he lived in Pasadena.  He doesn’t.  He lives in Burbank.  He just sold his house with no plan on what to do now but does want to move closer to work.  By doing this he will cut his 35 min commute down to 25.  HE’S HOMELESS FOR A POSSIBLE 20 MINUTE A DAY COMMUTE DIFFERENCE.

BTW I rarely spoke during this.  I would TRY to be nice but really went back and forth between debating him and standing up for myself and being “date” Wendy.  After he insulted my work I pretty much spent the rest of the “date” nodding, smiling, and drinking melted ice water.

He insulted Glendale and said anyone who lived there loved Armenians and was insane.

Insulted my major.  Couldn’t understand how I could have possibly minored in physics (in that — there is no way you are smart enough sort of way).  Then insulted my college but that was after this conversation.
Weirdo:  Where did you go to college?
Wendy:  Whittier College.
Weirdo:  Nixon went there.
Wendy:  True.  But not at the same time. (smile)
Weirdo:  Obviously. (in a “what are you a moron” way)

He got on the subject of Scientology.  Insulted them, then Mormons.  Then this conversation.
Weirdo:  You don’t believe religion exists. (not a question)
Wendy:  Oh I believe it exists.  I just don’t follow a religion.
Weirdo:  Your profile says you are an Atheist.
Wendy:  That’s right.
Weirdo:  That means you don’t think religion exits.  That’s insane (have you noticed this is his favorite word).  Of course it exists.
Wendy:  That’s not what Atheist means.
Then he went on to explain why science had it wrong.  Why the big bang couldn’t happen.  What does he think?  Well he went on to explain how we are like a giant computer game and don’t even know it and someone (not necessarily God) is in charge of everything we do.  Like when he plays a video game and the players in the game don’t know he is in charge.  Leading to this conversation:
Wendy:  Well I’ll tell you what.  I don’t believe I live in Tron.
Weirdo:  Of course not it isn’t like that.  It’s like the Matrix.
Wendy:  We live in the Matrix?
Weirdo:  Yes.  That is the best reference to what is happening.
Wendy:  So Scientologist are insane because they follow the writings of a fiction writer but you are normal for believing we live in a movie staring Keanu Reeves?
Weirdo:  Yes.  That is exactly what it is like.
Then lots of hand pounding on the table as he lectured me on chaos and patterns and blah blah blah.

Finally this is how it ended –
Wendy:  Well I finished my drink and I’m not having another one so it’s time to go.  I’m glad you came back and found me.
Weirdo:  Right.  Me too.
Then he pounded the table, stood up, and walked out the door.  Didn’t even look back.  He was gone before I grabbed my purse. I then waited in the bar for a while to make sure he would be gone before I left.

FREAK …. KING OF THE FREAKS … FREAK

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Aaaaaaahhhhh!

02 Wednesday Dec 2009

Posted by wendynewell in online dating, Riggins

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

douchebag, online dating, Riggins

I give up. Done. Out. See ya. Men are morons (sorry you are — all of you — ALL OF YOU). I’m marring Riggins and living happily ever after. If that freak in Japan can marry a computer avatar I can marry my dog. It will probably be legal in CA before my gay friends can get married so take that Yes an Prop 8ers and shove that up where the sun don’t shine. (http://features.csmonitor.com/innovation/2009/12/02/man-marries-video-game-girlfriend/)

Here are just a few things that have sent me jumping off the edge:

* Hey online daters. POST A PICTURE A HOLES. Seriously. POST A PICTURE. What is wrong with you? I am NOT going to suggest we meet for drinks if I haven’t seen a picture. Call me shallow. Fine. I’m shallow. But I have about 5 pictures of me up there and does that seem fair? No. Stop being such a holes and post your picture.

* Take the douche photos off. I find it SERIOUSLY HARD TO BELIEVE that the only photo you have of you is with your shirt off. Really that’s it? You live in a world without cameras and when you happen to see one you whip off your shirt, throw on your ray bans and strike your pose. That isn’t hot. That isn’t cool. That’s douch-y. Might as well put that Ed Hardy shirt back on (I know that is what it is) and just move on from my cyber life.

* Hey guys old enough to be my dad or grandfather. I realize I would totally be brilliant arm candy but unless you have added the words, “rich and near death” and have a doctor and banker’s note to prove it move along. I already admitted to being shallow so I don’t feel I have to apologise for this statement.

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Nothing Like An Emergency To Bring Out The A**holes

31 Monday Aug 2009

Posted by wendynewell in Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

asshat, douchebag, JPL, NASA, Station Fire

Since Wed. the “Station Fire” has burned up over 35,000 acres in the Los Angeles National Forest. I can see the flames now and then from my front yard. As I type the fire threatens the towers on Mt. Wilson which transmit all radio/tv for LA. About 1/2 hour ago it was confirmed that two firemen have died in their attempt to stop the flames. Today I went to the Pasadena Humane Society to drop of towels, food & $ for the animals whose human families are in shelters that they can’t hang out in. All in all, TRAGIC.
One of the buildings threatened, more so at the beginning of the fire, was/is JPL. I took the picture you see when I tired to go swimming at the Rose Bowl on Friday night but was turned away due to LARGE FLAMES. JPL is between the Rose Bowl and the flames you see. Not good. Burning down of JPL would be horrible.

Side note. I want to work at JPL. I really do. I think it would be so much fun and crazy exciting. That being said most jobs are for physicists and others who have crazy levels of schooling.
So I ask you … who hired the dipshit? I want to know. I want to know who was the hiring manager who that it was okay to hire the asshat. On Facebook JPL, who I follow on that and Twitter because I’m a loyal fan, posted a number of scary flame pictures. Many people commented, in general, wishing everyone well. Except Mr. Douchebag who wrote, “NO WORK TOMORROW, WOO HOO!!”. Despite his employment at the oh so famous JPL, he is too f*ing dumb to hide his profile so I found out he is a Financial Analyst for JPL. So not a scientist … but still … this guy got hired there? I’m horrified on behalf of NASA. Here was my response for all to see, “Did you just really “woo hoo” a major fire that took the lives of two firemen along with displacing numerous families from their homes? Really? THAT event just happens to keep you from working 8 hrs caused a “woo hoo”? I’m sure those whose lives are changed forever because of the horrible event tip their hats to you.” I hope he responds. I’m ready for a fight and can’t wait to take on this arrogant asshat nerd want-to-be behind the safety of my computer. Bring it chump.

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