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Me Myself & Riggins

Tag Archives: poo

Just Me

14 Monday Apr 2014

Posted by wendynewell in Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

bed, chihuahua, golden retriever, poo, Riggins, Sick

photo 3 (27)Has this ever happened to you …

You are going to the bathroom and then all of a sudden have a wave of nausea come over you that is so strong it includes sharp stabbing pains to your abdomen forcing you to have to lie down.  Right now.  Of course the perfect spot would be on the cool bathroom floor but you can’t flop down there because a giant golden retriever is taking up the majority of the floor while the rest is inhabited by two little dogs who make it their job to hold guard over your ankles whenever you sit down to poo.

photo 2 (36)So you crawl a few feet and lie down in the hall only to realize that you shouldn’t have procrastinated cleaning the carpet the past two weeks because it smells like dog ass.  The stench is really only making your nausea worse and  making it hard to think about anything but cleaning the carpet so you army crawl to the bedroom and managed to lie down on the bed face down.

Deciding dehydration is part of your problem you managed to get the inner strength to stumble to the fridge for some coconut water before going back to the bathroom to lie on the floor.  The little dogs had followed you into the bedroom leaving premium floor space free.  Of course since you didn’t clean the carpet what made you think you cleaned the bathroom floor?  Too gross to even attempt you head back to the bed only to realize it is now being utilized by 3 dogs.  Since you don’t have the strength to move anyone you lie backwards on the bed with photo 1 (35)you legs over your own dog in the hopes he will understand you have no choice at this moment.

As  you lie there moaning all you can think of is all the work you need to be doing right that second not to mention the now even more urgent need to clean all the floors in the house.   Finally  you feel stable enough to hit the bathroom and take a shower only to emerge a new person.

No?  No one?  Just me?  This morning experience was all mine?

photo 4 (19)P.S.  I’m fine.  I think it was a lack of sleep (I don’t sleep well the first night with new dogs.  I’m always afraid they are going to die in their sleep.), dehydration (although I didn’t do a long hike this morning, I did have to carry the fat chihuahua part of the way),  and eating too much at lunch (I was hungry).  I suppose if I am truthful though I really just needed to poop.

Pictures are of the dogs on their hike this morning.  Notice the smile on the fat chihuahua’s face while I’m carrying him.  He is pleased as punch with himself.

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Unmade Bed Vs. Poo Foot

15 Thursday Aug 2013

Posted by wendynewell in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

bed, chores, Dexter, mother nature, poo, Riggins, sushi

There are a few things in this world that make me realize humans can be real suckers.  Sushi, for example.  It’s super overpriced RAW fish … you realize you are all getting scammed right?  Or any cup of coffee over 75 cents.  Personally, I’ll never get over paying for bottled water.  One of the things that always puzzles me is making the bed in the morning.  Making a bed in a room that you will spend very little time in before you are going to jump in and mess that bed up all over again seems a bit futile doesn’t it?

photo (4)With all my dog watching I have gotten much better at my daily bed making.  I make my bed and then throw another sheet over it to “lock” it from any furry beast that may jump up on it during the day.  If at all possible I try to cut down on the number of dog hairs I lay my head on at night!  The last couple of days Riggins and I haven’t had any dogs to host so I haven’t been as gung-ho to take the time to make the bed before jumping in it again either later that day for a quick nap or that night for a long snooze.  During this time I’ve had to admit to myself that I would much rather crawl into a messy bed then a strictly made one.  When I make my bed I tuck in the corners and straighten everything out, as I assume you do.  Then when I get in I have to PUSH my legs down to the bottom and flail around for a bit to get everything untucked, comfy, and wrapped around me (or not).  It’s such a pain!  When my bed is just a giant pile of pillows and blankets I can jump in, pull what I want over me, kick off pillows, and snuggle into my own personal human birdie nest.  In the morning I take anything that got pushed off the bed during the night and throw it on top to be snuggled in again later that day.  If a dog takes a blanket, or for that matter all my blankets, I just grab my afghan (that doesn’t live on the bed) wrap myself up in a burrito and lie back down in my own personal comfy cocoon!

Dexter (cocker spaniel) is staying with us again today.  As soon as he showed up we headed off for a hike.  Once home I forced Riggins and him to pose for pictures for this post.  That is when I noticed that Riggins paw was covered in goop.  When I say goop I’m going to have to assume it is animal poop with mother nature attached to it (leaves, twigs, etc.).  He also smelled a lot like dead animal.  AND HE IS HAPPILY HANGING OUT ON MY UNMADE AND UNLOCKED BED!!!  AAAAAAAAHHHHH! (At one point in our adventure I stopped to take pictures of Dexter and me.  When I turned around Riggins had made his way upstream and off trail.  I assume that is where he picked up the dead animal scent and poo foot.)

Now I not only have to give Riggins a bath and make my bed I also have to change the sheets.  Gross.  Thanks a lot Riggins!  Way to screw up a perfectly good “not doing that chore” excuse!

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