You guys it’s 1 million degrees outside. Maybe 1 zillion. I’m dying. Riggins is dying. Riggins never did well in the heat but as he gets older his tolerance is even lower. As I get older I’m right there with him. Luckily, we will soon be heading up to my sisters and camping on a lake. That’s right … a lake.

I LOVE to swim. It makes me so happy. I can’t wait to get to my sister’s house and jump in their tiny little portable pool. It’s not big enough to do laps but it’s big enough for me to submerge my entire body in and grin with happiness! Then we will be off to the lake where Riggins can join in the fun (when I say join in I mean come into the water in a frenzy trying to save his mommy from drowning only to find out he is in water and claw his way up my body to sit on my head). He has a life-preserver so he won’t die and so he has a handle that I can use to turn him around and push his butt back to shore.

I can’t wait! Water water water here I come. I can’t wait to walk through the muck of the lake and get to the depth where I can swim. I can’t wait to swim wayyyyyyyy out and turn around to see all the little faces staring at me from shore. I can’t wait to use my new and improved Bar Method flexibility and toe pointing skills to choreograph one woman water dancing shows to the music in my head. I can’t wait to wrap a noodle around Riggins and force him to bob up and down in the water with me. I can’t wait to blow bubbles and push my hair off my eyes. I LOVE IT ALL. I’m never coming out of the water … EVER!

One thing that always causes anxiety when water is close is what bathing suit to wear. Am I right ladies? Here is the thing … I’m fit and all, but I look HORRIBLE in a two piece. I have amazing abs. Seriously. Super duper abs … they are just hidden under a layer of tummy fat. I feel like a beached whale in a two piece. I also get really annoyed in any fashion bathing suit that I can’t swim and be free without worrying about a wardrobe malfunction. Who has time to make sure their boob is covered when they are frolicking in the wonderful cool h2o? So I decided a few years ago to give up on fashion bathing suits and only wear my competitive swimming ones. They freakin’ rock! They fit and keep everything in place and you can swim and dive and splash and no one will see your goodies. I actually have a two piece competitive swim suit that I had sworn I was going to wear this summer. My thought was I would wear it to swim laps and get comfortable in it while tanning my lily white tummy. Alas I am jobless and can’t pay for pool time so my stomach still hasn’t seen the light of day. At one point I had the brilliant idea to wear it outside so I could sun while the dogs played, but I didn’t. Sunbathing is boring. I can’t do it. Then I thought it couldn’t be that bad? How different could my skin tone really be. So I held up my arm to my tummy and it turns out it was bad. Oh well …. no worries. I’ve got two great one pieces that will do just fine.

I’ve got Riggins life-preserver, my suit and open water goggles all ready! Throw in some sunscreen, undies and a nightshirt and Riggins and I can consider ourselves packed for the holiday weekend!